Walk By Faith

Leap of Faith

If anyone has been following my life for the past few years, you understand the attacks that our family has been enduring. I used to think of myself as a pretty smart person until I was continually blindsided by physical afflictions that have left me bedridden for long periods of time. My daughter, Katie, is also having a lot of harsh physical attacks on her body as well. I consider myself a very strong follower of Jesus Christ, and believe he has already set into place what needs to be done for a complete healing. It's not Him, it's me. I've asked God for a Special Needs class on healing as a joke. God agreed -- I've been in that class for the last four years. I'm a much slower learner than I expected. Finally, finally I am beginning to get glimpses of understanding.


#1 Think of your struggle (or struggles) as an impossibility to overcome and that is exactly what will happen. Now take those same struggles and apply faith in God to the circumstance. Nothing is impossible with God. Now I've said this over and over in my head. It has taken an excruciatingly long time for me to begin to grasp this in my heart.

In my current day to day walk do I...

• still miss my husband who has been deployed for 12 months now?


• still struggle with weakness and pain in my body?


• still receive bad medical reports regarding thyroid cancer?


• still struggle with having my children overcome their physical issues?

In the world's view, yes, of course, I struggle with all this and more. But whose fault is that really? God already made a way for us to walk through this to the other side. I am just beginning to grasp that the answers have been there all along, and I want to reason with my mind, not trust with my whole heart. As Dr. Phil might say, "How's that been workin' for you?" I'd have to say not so well. My heart is preparing for a full on faith battle, and we already know who the winner is!!!!

Watch the clip above from a classic Indiana Jones movie. Double click to get a bigger view. I think it clearly shows how our mind wrestles with our heart and what glorious things happen when we apply the faith that has been made ready for us.

Hang On, It's Going to Be a Wild Ride!

I am fighting a war above all wars in my life. Thyroid cancer. Got to admit this one caught me completely off guard. I was told by doctors at UAMS and Vanderbilt that there was no way I could have cancer. So of course when they told me I had thyroid cancer that had spread into my lymph nodes, I was not in a state to process it. That and the fact that I was alone and on morphine. The doctor came in and started telling me about the pathology report and treatment. The room was spinning and I remember asking the doctor, "Are you going to write this down?" She shook her head no and kept on talking, making a follow-up appointment two weeks later. All I remember was her repeatedly telling me I needed to stay away from small children.

The worst part was having to call my husband who was flying with his military company to training before moving out to Afganistan. He left thinking the thyroidectomy was a success and I would have a quick recovery. I told him while still on morphine and I am so blessed that I remember very little of that painful conversation.

I say I was alone in the room, but that was not true. I had a roommate named Wanda on the other side of the curtain. She and I had conversations earlier that only people with iv drips and morphine would understand. But she also knew God and the power of positive thinking. After the doctor left the room, it was quiet for a little while. Then I heard Wanda say, "What are you thinking?" I wasn't ready to put any thoughts into words yet, but I responded, "I guess I'm trying to figure out what to tell my husband." Wrong answer. Whoosh! the curtains came flying back and a determined, yet wobbly, patient began to lecture me. "Don't you even start letting the devil slip in with negative thoughts. We are gonna pray right now." And she did. I mean, she prayed hard. It whipped me back into fighting mode. I thank her for quickly getting my head on straight. I've lived a life understanding battles. I needed to call on my faith, and the sooner the better.

I expected this blog to be help me deal with Wayne's deployment. It is still that, of course, because I am missing him now more than ever. But it's become something more. I'm curious to see how this will all unfold. When I look back to this one year from now, I am excited to see what God will have done during this time. All for His glory!

Random Birthday Party

My girls, Katie and Megan just celebrated their fourteenth birthday party tonight. Actually they are still celebrating in another room with some friends. It's after midnight and I quit celebrating by 10:30. Every year I tell myself this will be the last sleepover, but I cave in when the next year rolls around. Really, I am blessed to have such sweet friends for my girls.

Some thoughts about "Bubba Teeth". Bet you didn't know I was going to go there, did you? Bubba teeth may be one of the greatest party favors to hand out at a teen birthday party. I mean it. Once the Bubba teeth went in, the girls had to have appropriate clothes, hair, and make-up to fit the mood. They ended up looking like hillbilly Whoville characters from "How the Grinch Stole Christmas." It was a look that every girl could achieve with a lot of flair!

The randomness of the party was such an icebreaker. The girls all dressed crazily and went outside to take pictures. There was no rhyme or reason to what we planned for the party. The one game we played was to divide the girls into two teams and give them each a bag with the same items inside (Bubba teeth (of course), a gaudy ring, a battery, a sock, a fork, and a trophy.) Each team had to come up with a play using all of the props and perform for the other group. I was to judge. They had so much fun that they forgot to ask who won, which is a relief because I don't think their performances will make it to the Oscars.

Near the end of the night we all sat around in a circle and the girls let myself and a dear friend of mine pour Jesus into their lives. I felt honored to be able to do this. A couple of times I joked that Katie and Megan would get me later for hijacking the party to talk about living a life that pleases God, but all of the girls said "no, we want to talk about this. this is cool." I really felt like God's hand was on that conversation and might even open a door for any one of the girls that need to have some questions answered. It was neat.

Baby Huey

I was working as an educational director for a behavioral program with students that had psychiatric and/or behavioral issues. Many of these students were hard to deal with, and I was intimidated by them, although I would never let them know. As time passed, however, I began to get a much better understanding of what made some of them tick.

There was one student in particular. He was HUGE! He FILLED the doorway, and he was still a fairly young high school student. There were some occasions when his frustration would spill into rage and we would have to call the police for help. Whenever we called the police and mentioned the name of this student, they would always send at least two patrol cars. As upset as he would get, he still had a desire to do right.

One day he was in a particularly foul mood. I knew it was only a matter of time, and before the hour was up he became very aggressive. We are trained in methods of restraining students in these extreme cases. There were four of us trying to restrain him while waiting for the police to arrive. As the director I normally don't get involved physically and I dress more professionally. As we were trying to restrain him, I said quietly in his ear, "Please _____, settle down. I just bought this shirt." He said, "Oh, sorry Ms. Melissa." and layed still! He did not move until the police arrived, then calmly went with them. I learned a valuable lesson that day.

STOMP

The girls and I went to see STOMP tonight. If you've never seen them you should check them out on youtube.com. They are amazing!!! I wonder why I enjoy them so much. I have no rhythm whatsoever. Have any of you seen the movie "The Jerk", where Steve Martin has not rhythm and that is one way he discovers he is white? I must be Steve Martin's cousin. It sure was fun, though.

Real Teachers

I love homeschooling my children. We've done the whole spectrum -- public school, private school and homeschool. For our family, we are in the right place at the right time. I still miss the days of teaching in a classroom sometimes. I came across this list of characteristics of Real Teachers and thought it was classic!

• Real teachers grade papers in the car, during commercials, in faculty meetings, in the bathroom, and (at the end of the nine weeks) have been seen grading in church.


• Real teachers cheer when they hear April 1 does not fall on a school day.


• Real teachers can't walk past a crowd of kids without straightening up the line.


• Real teachers have disjointed necks from writing on boards without turning their backs on the class.


• Real teachers are written up in medical journals for size and elasticity of kidneys and bladders.


• Real teachers have been timed gulping down a full lunch in 2 minutes, 18 seconds. Master teachers can eat faster than that.


• Real teachers can "sense" gum.


• Real teachers have their best conferences in the parking lot.


• Real teachers have never heard an original excuse.


• Real teachers buy Excedrin and Advil at Sam's.


• Real teachers have the assistant principals' and counselors' home phone numbers.


• Real teachers know secretaries and custodians run the school.


• Real teachers have the time to listen; know they teach students, not subjects; and they are absolutely non-expendable.